July 17, 2021 - Pastor Message
December 21, 2024THE YEAR OF ST. JOSEPH INLAWS
THE YEAR OF ST. JOSEPH INLAWS
“During those days Mary set out and traveled to the hill country in haste to a town of Judah, where she entered the house of Zechariah and greeted Elizabeth. When Elizabeth heard Mary’s greeting, the infant leapt in her womb, and Elizabeth, filled with the Holy Spirit, cried out in a loud voice and said, ‘Most blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb. And how does this happen to me that the mother of my Lord should come to me? For at the moment your greeting reached my ears, the infant in my womb leapt for joy. Blessed are you who believed that what was spoken to you by the Lord would be fulfilled’” (Luke 1:39-45).
Sometimes I almost pity St. Joseph. Not only did he have the huge task of protecting and raising the Son of God, but his wife was one of the only two perfect people who ever lived! Not only that, but several of his in-laws also went on to be saints. How could Joseph, just an ordinary man, ever live up to such examples of holiness and perfection as Mary’s parents, Joachim and Anne, or her cousins, Zechariah and Elizabeth? Joseph must have felt threatened at least a little, from time to time, trying to live up to their standard.
But in some ways, isn’t that true of many people and their in-laws? Continuing our observance of the Year of St. Joseph, we reflect on in-laws this month in which we celebrate the feast day of Joseph’s in-laws, saints Joachim and Anne (July 26). The idea of testy relationships between people and their in-laws has become so commonplace that comedians write jokes about it. Certainly not all in-laws have adversarial relationships; in fact, some are quite close, with people calling their mother and father-in-law mom and dad. But there is a kernel of truth to the common image of feuding in-laws, and there can be strained feelings and even animosity.
Sometimes this may be for very valid reasons, but more often it stems from the feeling of being threatened by ones in-laws. All families are different, with different customs and traditions, with different values, and with different ways of relating to one another. On the part of parents, they can perceive their child’s spouse as trying to take their child away from them and their family and to change their traditions and values. On the part of married persons, they can perceive their spouse’s parents as being intrusive and of trying to prevent them and their spouse from starting a family of their own with their own values and traditions. Without any ill intentions on anyone’s part, both sides can feel threatened by the other, which can lead to conflict and hard feelings. We can look to St. Joseph again for help getting past these misperceptions to healthier and holier family relationships, which is what we will reflect on in next week’s column, so stay tuned!
Fr. Marc Stockton
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